Learning . . . . BREEEAAAAKKKKK !!!!

AAaaarrrrgghhhhh . . . patah seakan patah beneran . . . the visit back to novus back was somehow .......errrrrrrrrrrrrr . . . emotionally drainful. With the hopes of simply rejuvenating myself . . . i guess i had put too much hopes on this visit.

I don’t know why at first . . . but slowly as the days past, i couldn’t deny the feeling that there was something wrong with me. It slowly started as a subtle sign of loneliness . . . withdrawal and tiredness. But i guess it took me almost the whole journey there to finally understand whats lingering inside me.
Side effects anyone?surely there was . . . and it almost came out really nasty as I felt the urge to suddenly punch someone in the face or even take a cigarette. Luckily neither was done, but those signs finally gave me the kickback that there was definitely something bad on me. And I had to do something soon at least to not let someone else hurt.

Why it happen. If u ask for a root, then i guess i’m kinda feelin fed up with all the routines around me. As u know from previous blogs, having “my” time lately has been really hard. Your life has been like a piece of cake, being sliced and given to other people leaving only nothing or at least a small portion for yourself. Good thing for others as they get to know u more, but for me . . . hmmppfff . . . can’t really say anything.

What can I say now is that I wanna keep a distance from the others for the moment, try to find back my lost soul and preserving what’s left of my sanity. One thing is for sure, the learning break did manage to break my mind into pieces. Good thing for me, it did kinda leave my head in a somewhat fragmented brain, making me into some kind of limbo. Gotta get back to my reality as life is to short to keep myself occupied in my breakness . . . .